Who am I, and what is my purpose? That is a question I seem to hear a lot lately, what I plan for the future, when will I return to work, what will I do with my time? Some people have ideas for me, I should write, or draw, or go back to photography. It’s even been suggested that I could run workshops and teach people how to use their camera, but I don’t really know if I want to do anything like that any more. Actually, I KNOW I don’t want too, I want to give my photos away to anyone who wants them, anyone who they will bring joy to.
Just over a year ago I had a successful business, awards, and bookings a year or more in advance, the things that most people would consider make someone successful. But those things couldn’t stop me falling apart, they didn’t bring happiness, or ease my anxiety and depression. Having money didn’t make the nightmares go away, or stop the tears falling. No awards hung on our walls, because the voice inside me told me that it was a fluke that I’d won them, I should not be prideful.
I was just not career focused. Secular success is not my calling, maybe I am good at it, but it is not my purpose. I struggle to place monetary value on my time or talents, in the end I could only bring myself to place a figure for what my time was worth to my children, and husband.
My favourite jobs were those ones where the clients became my friends, and those who we met whose stories touched our hearts and we were able to offer to photograph them and their families for no charge. Over the years I donated my time on a regular basis to these courageous people, especially those with family members who were unwell, each of those has a special place in my heart and I am proud that I was able to have a small part in making their lives a little happier at that time.
My calling is to do something that betters others. I want to make them feel like someone cares, that they belong, that they matter, that they are loved and respected, wanted, accepted, and safe. I want to make the world a better, kinder, more gentle place. I do believe that God has helped me to have the desire and the tools to do this.
Helping and nurturing others is something I feel excited by, passionate about. Being able to see someone smile gives me an inner warmth. It is not “altruistic”, I admittedly get a lot from this myself – it fills me with warmth and gives me purpose.
So if you would like to download my work, simply follow this link and take whatever you would like. They are free, and licensed under creative commons so you can use them however you like – you don’t even need to attribute them! Just enjoy. You are making me happy.
Bookmark it!! I’ll be adding more and more.